Day 217. six

Dear Z,

We had a very good week, but the first day was hard. Wow, you have no clue how hard it was on us.
It broke our hearts to see you crying because "you were feeling lonely, and did not want to be all by yourself forever".
Your words me think about so many things I have done, so many bad choices I have made and why I did not work a little harder to give you someone else to be with, besides Me and Daddy.

I felt really sad.

We have always tried to find a way to give you a brother/sister, but life is so complicate. I guess you already know that.
We though that adoption would be the solution linked to a good cause, but lots of doors were closed and we came across of lots of dead ends.

 Maybe adoption it is not in our destiny.

I really want you to have that sense of having a brother or a sister.  That warm feeling of companionship.  The feeling of knowing that besides mom and daddy, you have someone else to love and be loved by, without any doubt and with all your heart. I know that feeling very well, and man.. how I wish you could have that.

So I promise you that, I will do whatever it takes to fill your gap, to make you happy, to make your heart happier, and take that feeling of being alone forever away from you. But I want you to know that having a sibling is not always easy, it does take effort, sharing, caring, taking care off, getting over of some fights... and lots of love. Lots of love.  But it can be a wonderful thing, and bring wonderful feelings inside.



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3 comments:

  1. The vulnerability and honesty in this post has tears welling in my eyes. Thank you for sharing.

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  2. Doors open when you least expect it. The time will come, never give up, never loose hope.
    I am an only child and I only have one. I don't know how my sons journey will be affected by my choices, but I can tell you I always was a happy kid and grew up to be a happy adult. He is beautiful, he will thrive and his life will be full of wonderful relationships. Believe.

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  3. We adopted three children. It took four years of paperwork etc. but then along came a 3 year old boy and his two sisters who were 2 and 6 months and our life has not been the same. We wanted to give up on the process many times but we knew that God had children for us somewhere and we were right. Keep on keeping on. God bless you.

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Thank you for stopping and leaving your thoughts, I really appreciate.